Miley Cyrus Teaches American Idol Contestants How to Suck and Still Be Famous

Disney star Miley Cyrus will guest on American Idol this week as the mentor for ‘Billboard #1 Hits’ week. Yes, Tuesday night we get to listen to Miley Cyrus give advice to the likes of Crystal Bowersox, who could already pretty much crush Cyrus into the ground like a cockroach with her voice.

Miley Cyrus (Photo: calmdownlove - Source: Wikimedia Commons)
Miley Cyrus (Photo: calmdownlove - Source: Wikimedia Commons)

For the theme this round (which was suddenly change for some reason from ‘Teen Idols’ to “Billboard Hits’), they should just go ahead and call it ‘Disney Advertising Shoved in Your Face’ week. After viewers are tortured with the horror that is Miley Cyrus on Tuesday night, they’ll be slapped with groan-worthy performances from Joe Jonas and Demi Lovato on Wednesday’s elimination night.

Note to American Idol producers, it’s kind of lame to put on mentors and performers who suck worse than most of your contestants on the show.

On the other hand, if the American Idol powers-that-be want to show the contestants that you can have a mediocre at best voice, ‘accidentally’ leak semi-nude photos of your underage ass online and act like a nasty, whiny bitch – yet still be filthy rich and famous – we guess Miley Cyrus is just about the best mentor you could get.

>> Previously:  Tim Urban Survives American Idol Rolling Stones Week Much to Our Dismay