Britney Can’t Go On Tour With Madonna, Y’all.

Ding-dang, y’all, Britney Spears just got cut from Madonna’s Sticky and Sweet bodybuilding concert tour. Madge is pissed at Britney ‘cuz Britney won’t wear that dumb red string around her wrist anymore. She’s ditched Kabbalah, a cardinal sin in Madonna’s book.

Brainy-Britney had been following the mystical Jewish-ish spinoff as part of her ongoing attempts to straighten out her public image. Girl, you have a MAJOR problem if the best thing you can come up with to fix your public image is joining a cult.

A source says:

Madonna is dismayed that Britney has just dropped Kabbalah. She’s always believed it is a way of life, not just something to pick up and get rid of on a whim. Madonna doesn’t feel she can work with Britney any more because they’re just not aligned on a spiritual level.

Madonna, you dumbass. Everyone knows Britney’s aligned on a spiritual level with CHEETOS. Geez.