Miley Cyrus: Not Having “Underaged Sex”


Miley Cyrus’ rep felt the need to put out a statement on her behalf today. According to Miley’s spokesperson, 15 year-old Miley is not having “underaged sex” with her 20 year-old boyfriend Justin Gaston. Why in the world would anyone think that? Not because Miley was snapped seductively licking her lips watching Justin walk the runway for Christian Audigier’s the other night during L.A.’s Fashion Week, surely! And of course, the fact that Miley and Justin were making out HEAVILY backstage had nothing to do with it either, right? Surely Miley was just JOKING when she was overheard telling a friend that “she was probably staying at Justin’s tonight and that they were going to skip the after-party and have a party of their own.”

Sounds like Billy Ray and Leticia Cyrus have a MAJOR fire on their hands, one that’s been building for quite awhile. But, there could be even MORE to this than meets the eye. Miley and Billy Ray want OUT of their “Hannah Montana” Disney contracts, and have been making life miserable for everyone on-set. Sure would be convenient for Miley to “sex” her way out of the Magic Kingdom, huh. Moms everywhere are getting antsy at Miley’s ever increasing provocative behavior, and AREN’T looking for another Britney to lead their daughters astray. Disney knows it, and has been grooming Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato to ascend to Miley’s golden throne.

Justin Gaston better be VERY careful around the extremely powerful and headstrong jail-bait. Miley may be a cash cow, but if she pulls a Jamie Lynn Spears, Justin could be headed for the slammer. Miley might end up SHOPPING at Wal-Mart instead of dominating it. All that Hannah Montana merchandise would go straight to the dumpster. Oh well, at least Miley has plenty of heinous Hannah-wigs if she decides to shave her head.

Michael Jacksonwear

Those crazy kids at Kitson have bought it again! First it was Heidi Montag’s dirt cheap “Heidiwood” line- for those who love the poly-skank look. Now, it seems Michael Jackson’s teamed up with Ed Hardy designer Christian Audigier to create some new Jacksonfug for the demented, and Kitson’s reportedly gonna carry it.

“It’s still in the developing stages, but it’s going to be big,” a source told Life & Style Weekly. “This will be a major comeback for Michael. He’s dedicating a lot of his time and money to this venture.”

Since when did Michael Jackson have any MONEY? Is this why Neverland’s on the block? The only thing that’s “big” about Jacko is his bed. I’m starting to think that Ed Hardy operates on the “self published book” model. Sure! You too can have your book published, for $250,000! I pity the poor soul who gets THIS marketing job thrown in their lap. Better go after the European tourists or this is gonna flop bigger than Flipper.