June 10, 2009

Crimes Against Fashion: Michelle Obama Edition

Rarely is Snarkista speechless, but today she’s pretty damn close. Behold Michelle Obama in London, one of the fashion capitols of the world. Unfortunately, Miss Thang appears to have run through the notions department at Fabrics-R-Us following a vicious glue-gun fight. “But,” you may say, “perhaps she was visiting Piccadilly Circus, and was tripped up […]

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February 19, 2009

Katy Perry Barfs At The Brits

Katy Perry got super-sick after accepting the award for “Best International Female”. She had to rush backstage to throw up. Katy told the audience after winning her trophy: “I’m so sick right now, but they said I should show up because something special might happen. Thank you to everyone at my record label.” Tubby buddy […]

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January 26, 2009

Crimes Against Fashion: Jessica Simpson Edition

Holy mom-jeans, Jessica. No! This outfit absolutely gets a top-4 seed in the “Jessica Simpson Crimes Against Fashion Tournament and Chili Cookoff.” Which is sorta where Jessica was when she squeezed into THIS little number! A chili-cookoff, that is, doing her act in front of 3,000 actual people! It beats bingo halls and bowling alleys […]

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January 12, 2009

Crimes Against Fashion: Renee Zellweger Edition

Renee Zellweger had a fashion FAIL at the 66th Annual Golden Globe Awards this weekend…pairing a black fishtail dress with a transparent top with a white bra. WTF? Surely Renee had a mirror available whilst getting dressed for the Globes, but it sure doesn’t look like it. And her Bridget Jones hair doesn’t help any […]

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December 29, 2008

Crimes Against Fashion: Katie Holmes Edition (Again)

Sigh. Oh, Katie Holmes. Snarkista is naming you her winner for “Most Crimes Against Fashion 2008.” No, it won’t help you get a Tony Award. Are you not living in New York, arguably the fashion capital of the world? And is it not WINTER in New York? Even if the city’s experiencing a warm snap, […]

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December 18, 2008

Tom Cruise Gives Katie Holmes Hallucinogens For Her Birthday

Tom Cruise has been on a tour lately to try and convince us he’s normal. Guess what? Nice try, but EPIC FAIL. Tommy-Girl has been alluding for weeks that his birthday present for wife Katie Holmes was going to be really special. Oh, it’s special alright. Katie better haul ass. Tom revealed his present to […]

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December 13, 2008

An Open Letter To Pamela Anderson

Dear Pamela Anderson, You are almost 40. Your ladybits are wailing right now, as you are using a glittery leotard as a garrote on them. It is December, and this is your second violation this week. Consider looking into pants? To wear, just so we’re clear. With concern for the global Monistat supply, Snarkista

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November 4, 2008

Crimes Against Fashion: Victoria Beckham Edition

Holy insufferability, Victoria Beckham! What is UP with THIS jet-set outfit? You look like a cross between The Fly and Karl Lagerfeld. No, really. Those are Karl’s sunglasses, and he wants them back. Tom Hanks wants his Polar Express cap back too, and PETA is coming for that heinous coat- er, dress -uh, torso-cover. Swat […]

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October 16, 2008

Crimes Against Fashion: Mel B (Scary Spice) Edition

WOAH. Melanie Brown, they didn’t call you Scary Spice for nothing. What the fug are you wearing???! Guess the recession’s even hurting sci-fi costume designers, because the ingredients here cost about $6.99. Don’t think about getting NEAR Natalie Portman in this crap. She’d look down her nose on you anyways, but why give her more […]

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October 10, 2008

Katie Holmes On “Eli Stone”: Yikes.

Oh, help. Snarkista told Katie Holmes NO to this look back in July as Katie was filming a cameo for Eli Stone. She HOPED it would not have been captured on film, but was just another of Katie’s Crimes Against Fashion. Sadly, it WAS her look on the show. Katie’s not a real great singer […]

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