Miley Cyrus Shows Her Ass

Miley, Miley, Miley. Another shot leaked from your effin’ phone. Or from some other gadget you have. Such a flattering pose, too! Nick Jonas will come running back now- SCREW SELENA GOMEZ!!

Seriously girl, people are stepping on each other to get a hold of this shizz. Snarkista thinks you have an addiction. PLEASE Call PicsAnon immediately. Do not bring your phone to the meetings.
Exasperatedly,

Snarkista

>> Next Up: Miley Cyrus Deletes Twitter Account for Boyfriend Liam Hemsworth

When It All Started Downhill For Miley Cyrus And Nick Jonas

This is all soooo junior high ….so you may need a MAP. Snarkista gets a laugh out of Miley Cyrus attempting to make fun of her NOW ex’s new (and prettier) girlfriend. You know Miley has that new Rolling Stone cover of the Jonas brothers plastered EVERYWHERE. Not that she’s a stalker like Aniston. Apparently, Miley’s just apologized for this video, but Snarkista’s not sure she’s sincere!

Disney girl Selena Gomez (“The Next Miley Cyrus”) made a YouTube video awhile back with her equally cute best friend and fellow Disney star Demi Lovato (possibly another “The Next Miley Cyrus”). Miley used to date Nick Jonas, who is NOW dating Selena, and Miley’s not a big fan.

Miley struck back the way she does everything offstage…on camera. Miley’s annoying friend Mandy’s in the clip too. Notice how instinctively Miley pulls her shirt to show the camera! The video is mindless, and only important for one reason. Miley, this kinda shizz is why Nick, the nice boy, bolted.

Girls, Snarkista’s gonna give you a BIG rule to follow. No matter how many of your friends send skanky pics to their boyfriends, DO NOT DO IT if your boyfriend is (hopefully) a NICE BOY. NICE BOYS will run away. If you want a prince, you must behave like a princess. (Not the diva kind, or the My Super Sweet Sixteen kind). This is a timeless rule, and no matter how much your friends say it’s stupid, hide and watch and you”ll see Snarkista is RIGHT.

And Miley? Lay off the Ritalin (or Adderall)! You really need to stop being the loudest girl in the room, another MAJOR rule violation. Here’s Miley and Mandy’s video making fun of Demi and Selena’s video. OMG! She’s SUCH a BITCH!!

The Cover Of The Rolling Stone: Jonas Brothers Edition

Nick, Joe and Kevin Jonas have just done what every singer, musician and band wants to do. Be on the cover of the Rolling Stone. It’s a milestone in a successful career, one that a minuscule number of artists ever achieve. And they are all under 21. What do they want the world to know? That they’re a real band. Disney’s been great to them, but they want to be seen for the musicians they are. A tween’s dream, they are truly a drug for a young girl’s brain. Sayeth the Stone:

Big Rob escorts Nick, Kevin and Joe to their places. Suddenly, the lights go dark, triggering a roar in the 20,000-seat Cricket Wireless Pavilion that can only be described as primal. And it is, in a way. The neuropsychiatrist Dr. Louann Brizendine, author of the bestseller The Female Brain, says the release of dopamine in a screaming teenage girl’s brain upon seeing her pop idols is like “injecting heroin.” Being with other screaming girls, she says, only makes the effect wilder.

“There’s a thing in biology we call synchrony,” Brizendine says. “Basically, one girl affects another affects another, and it becomes a domino effect building up to that level of hysteria. They are getting all these brain hits of dopamine, and also oxytocin, which is a love-and-bonding hormone. Teenage girls have so much estrogen, which just catapults the level of dopamine and oxytocin in the brain, creating this sort of ecstatic rush in themselves and others. It truly is a state of ecstatic love.”

It’s nearing 8:00 on a sweltering night in Phoenix, and as the temperature mercifully dips below 100 degrees, a trillion swelling hormones have collected at the Cricket Wireless Pavilion to experience the Jonas Brothers. Among the undersize pilgrims in attendance are Jordan and Jackie, a pair of blond preteens from nearby Scottsdale. Moments ago, they met the Jonas Brothers in person at a “meet and greet” photo op, and now they stand red-cheeked, quivering and sobbing uncontrollably, as if they’ve been told that Disneyland just burned down, with the world’s supply of kittens and baby pandas trapped inside.

“Omigodomigodomigod,” Jordan says, holding her arms aloft and shaking her palms in the air.

“I got tingles in my body all over the place, because I. Just. Met. Nick. Jonas,” Jackie says.

“I’ve wanted to meet them for, like, my whole entire life,” Jordan says.

How old are you?

“Ten.”

It’s like this everywhere.

The interview is great, and you can read the online version here at Rollingstone.com
The issue hits the stands July 25th.

Snark Sightings

Francis Bean Cobain’s A Rolling Stone: Celebitchy

The View’s Sherri Shepherd’s Public Confessions: Nina Monroe Says

Jonas Brothers Are Moving To Texas! Bitten And Bound

Jude Law Gets A Little Help: Ten Gossip

Britney Lets Little Sean Play With Bad Toys: Backseat Cuddler

Chriss Angel’s Gonna Try Not To Fry: Behind Blondie Park

Audrina Patridge Needs A Lift: Mom Pop Son

Jodie Marsh Could Knock You Out: Newstoob

Incubus Is Gettin’ Schooled: Gravy And Biscuits

All About Crack: Janelle

Jonas Brothers To Headline 2008 VMA Awards

Dangit, I hear the sound of squealing from the girls down the street! Why? MTV’s VMA Awards are gonna be a tween dream because the Jonas Brothers will be headlining the event! The confirmation of the news was revealed by the band themselves, during their performance at FNMTV last night. In their press release, the Bros expressed their excitement of being chosen to perform at the annual event saying

This is an awesome opportunity! We have grown up watching all the amazing and iconic performances on the VMAs. It is an honor to be a part of something so incredible.

The Awards will air live, September 7th at 9 p.m. FNMTV host Pete Wentz also announced that for the first time in the VMA’s history, fans will select nominees and the vote for the winners in eight categories. The first two categories open to votes are best male video and best female video. Fans will select nominees for six remaining categories in the coming weeks, including video of the year, pop video, best hip-hop video, best rock video, best new artist and best dancing in a video. Click here to vote!

In the meantime, the Brothers are busy preparing the release of their new album “A Little Bit Longer”, which is scheduled drop on August 12. The band released their second single from the album – “Pushing Me Away” on July 15 via iTunes music store. Here’s the song for ya- wonder if it’s a secret message to Miley Cyrus?


No doubt Miley WILL be around in some form or fashion stalking Nick Jonas. Nick, if you’re listening, stay AWAY from the i-phone. Miley doesn’t know how to push DELETE, and there’s no telling WHAT will make it’s way onto the net next!

Miley’s New “7 Things” Video: Take That, Nick Jonas!

7 Things is basically about getting over a past boyfriend. Rumors are buzzing that it is actually about Nick Jonas of the Jonas Brothers. Miley and Nick dated last year, but Nick didn’t want to go public with their relationship.

Even though he wanted to keep it under wraps, Miley reportedly kissed him on stage last year for all the world to see. Nick then put a screeching halt to their relationship, and broke poor Miley’s heart. Ah, we all remember that first big breakup. The album, Breakout, is scheduled to drop on July 22. Good thing there’s no naughty candy in the video! Here’s Miley as Avril Lavigne.

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Billy Ray Cyrus Better Get That Shotgun Out

Miley Cyrus has once again been kind enough to share some kissy pics on her Myspace! This time she’s cuddling up with Jonas Brother Nick Jonas. Billy Ray needs to get some new spy software! Myspace is EASY to crack, Snarkista knows! Get some keylogging software and you’ll be on your way. Anyone with a teenager is crazy if they think their kid isn’t up on the internet posting 1000 dumb pics of themselves. But bustin’ ’em is EASY!!

Miley Cyrus is saying she is “too much” for guys to handle. The 15-year-old ‘Hannah Montana’ actress refuses to calm her “crazy” ways for any potential boyfriends. Miley – who caused controversy after posing topless for magazine Vanity Fair – said:

“I’m too much to handle right now. “I can’t be quiet and cute for boys – I have to be a bit crazy.”

Miley obvs has ADD, she’s so hyper she can’t stop doing the head whip onstage! She has enough energy left over to make danceoff videos with her BFF Mandy, film a movie, and keep us all up to date on her Myspace. Methinks Miley doesn’t sleep much. Back away from the Adderall, Miles! Try slippin a little Benadryl into her evening beverage, Billy Ray- she’ll conk out before she gets her daily smoochin’ update out to the world. Trust Snarkista. She KNOWS.