July 18, 2008

Tom Cruise: Box Office Poison

Tom Cruise isn’t going to be playing the role of Edwin A. Salt, a fictional CIA officer who is outed as a spy. Fox 411 reports that the production, “Edwin A. Salt,” from Columbia Pictures, has been a huge, expensive headache. Now Tom is out, and apparently it’s about the money. Tommy still thinks he’s […]

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July 17, 2008

Hair Crimes: Katie Holmes Edition

Nooooooo, Katie! NO! INTERVENTION! If this has something to do with your mini “singing and dancing” guest appearance on “Eli Stone” this season, you better HOPE they haven’t filmed it yet. Ken Paves could do better than this. Flapper? Early Paul McCartney meets a curling iron? 1970’s Susan Sarandon? FIRE THE STYLIST. And unleash Tom […]

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July 8, 2008

Katie Holmes Isn’t Cuttin’ It On Broadway

Duck, y’all, the wrath of Xenu is coming! NY Post’s Michael Riedel reports that when it comes to the Broadway box office, the current Mrs. Tom Cruise has NOTHIN’ on the FORMER Mrs. Tom Cruise. Katie Holmes is starring in the revival of Arthur Miller’s “All My Sons” this fall, but production sources are worried […]

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June 19, 2008

How Tom Cruise Got Oprah!

A brilliant scientist has discovered a way to reveal the aura of Xenu that surrounds Tommy-Girl! NOW we know what zombified Katie! Instant lobotomy! This explains a LOT about “Oprah’s New World”.

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June 5, 2008

Tommy + Chace= Gossiping Girls

The “Superhero” themed Met Costume Institute Ball in New York last week brought out a wide variety of celebs and socialites, along with some very interesting “costumes”. Not gonna detail the clothes- suffice to say there was the usual good, bad and incredibly fugly. Tommy and “Kate” Cruise were there, in Armani. Several of the […]

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