She went on to say that there is nothing derivative about her music, and that as a songwriter she prides herself on her originality.  Gaga claims that it is ridiculous to compare anything she has ever done to anything Madonna has ever done.  Now, of course, no one cares about the originality thing anymore – they just want to know if she’s going to apologize for saying “retarded.”

Grzegorz Matlok broke into an upper-floor window of Madonna’s mansion after no one answered the front door.  He made himself at home, fully believing that he had the right to be there.  Luckily, neither Madonna nor any of her children were in London at the time.  The man has been taken to court and his fate remains to be seen, pending some psychiatric tests to discover just how insane he actually is.

There was little left to the imagination, and as Madonna turned around and showed her partially bare rear end to eager photographers, Lourdes was heard complaining loudly and telling her mother to act like an adult. I don’t think that message will ever get through – Madonna will continue to dress however she wants until she finally drops dead of exhaustion, which probably won’t happen anytime in the next couple of decades at the very least.

“Express Yourself” and “Vogue” are the two songs that most often come up when people are asked what they think the new Gaga single sounds like, but some have said that it’s reminiscent of “Like a Prayer” or even TLC’s “Waterfalls.”  Good thing imitation is the sincerest form of flattery!

There’s nothing official yet, it’s all still Madonna’s people negotiating with the Glee people, but it looks like some of the main characters from the show will appear for collaborative numbers on stage, sort of blurring the line between a concert and a musical.  That could be interesting, as long as it doesn’t become too cheesy.

They appear to be having a wonderful time and are taking in everything the city has to offer.  That’s sweet and everything, and I wish them all the best, but I have to admit I don’t get Cameron’s taste in men.  She seems to have a fetish for pop star leftovers – first Britney’s ex, and now Madonna’s.  If Cameran ever starts dating Jordan Bratman, I think we may need to stage an intervention.

Considering how far from the cutting edge Morgan’s interview with Oprah was, perhaps he shouldn’t start banning people and trying to act like he’s all that until he’s established some sort of reputation as the superstar host he seems to think he is.  In fact, Madonna got the last word when she was asked what she thought about being banned by Piers Morgan – her rep simply replied, “Madonna doesn’t know who Piers Morgan is.”  Ouch.

Apparently a membership at the luxury fitness center costs $160 per month.  That kind of membership fee seems insultingly steep to me – is the average salary of a Mexico City resident high enough that $160 for a gym membership is actually reasonable, or is this Madonna’s way of excluding all but the most wealthy people?  I didn’t think she was that hard-up for cash.

Vidal says that Madonna was already a pop phenomenon when Vidal herself was back in school, so it’s a bit strange for one of her childhood pop idols to be dating her son.  Madonna’s reps have said that Vidal’s tale is fabricated, and that it’s absolutely untrue that Madonna and Rachiki are dating.  Which of course means they totally are.

The first Hard Candy location is due to open in Mexico City next month, and ten other locations will soon follow.  The most interesting tidbit: not one of the first wave of Hard Candy branches is to be located in the US.  Make of that what you will.