Mary Kate Olsen Preggers? Please!


Some fool at the National Enquirer is trying to get us to believe that lil’ Mary Kate Olsen is pregnant. WHATEVER! Sure, she’s been wearing baggy clothes, but…she always is in the dreaded caftan. That little elf burned up her lady parts when she quit eating years ago, so if she’s knocked up it is due to some freakin’ high tech doctoring.

Supposedly Mary Kate now weighs a whopping 102 pounds due to being preggers with her artist-boyfriend Nate Lowman’s baby. “The source” who blabbed to the Enquirer says that she was inspired to start a family by late actor, and close friend, Heath Ledger – who told her becoming a father was the most rewarding thing he had ever done.

The source added:

“Mary-Kate really took Heath’s words to heart. She wanted the same kind of fulfillment in her life that Heath found in his after becoming a dad. She is really happy with Nate and is very excited they will soon be starting their family together.”

Snarkista thinks “the source” has already spent that Enquirer Christmas bonus, and that she’ll believe this one when she sees a bump under one of those bag-lady outfits.