July 24, 2009

Katie Holmes ‘Kills’ With So You Think You Can Dance Judy Garland Tribute

Actress Katie Holmes killed on last night’s So You Think You Can Dance with a tribute performance to Judy Garland – but not in a good way. The dance stylings of Mrs. Tom Cruise on So You Think You Can Dance were so torturous, it’s amazing live audience members didn’t keel over from sheer horror.
The [...]

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May 11, 2009

Katie Holmes Is About To Go Nuts

Imprisoned starlet Katie Holmes is rumored to be in danger of cracking up over hubby Tom Cruise’s pressure for her to have another Sci-bot. Their little Suri- princess of the universe- is OVER Katie’s pretending to be a designer so she can get out of the basement and share Suri’s craft room. [...]

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April 30, 2009

Crimes Against Fashion: Katie Holmes, Edition NO.

Katie Holmes popped out of Aladdin’s lamp the other night, escaping to the Independent Filmmaker Project’s annual in NYC. Katie can surprise with some whack outfits, including some unfortunate self-creations. Is this Jen Aniston meets “I Dream Of Jeanie” another one? No matter who made it, it’s classic K-bot.
Kate zips us back [...]

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January 28, 2009

Tom Cruise Wants To Play Hero Airline Captain

Little Tommy Cruise hearts superpilot Captain Chesley Sullenberger SO MUCH. Captain Chesley successfully crash-landed a US Air passenger jet in the Hudson river, saving all 150 passengers due to his incredible skill- and is a hero! Tommy played a pilot hero in Top Gun, so that makes him want this role even more. AND [...]

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January 5, 2009

Katie Holmes To Fix Her Looks By Poisoning Herself

Reportedly, dumbass Katie Holmes is teetering on the brink of TOTAL physical and mental disintegration. “But she’s brainwashed, Snarkista! Don’t blame poor Katie!” Ah, but either Katie didn’t do her homework on crazy Tom Cruise before they hooked up, or she just couldn’t resist his mad powers.
Australia’s NW magazine details how [...]

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December 29, 2008

Crimes Against Fashion: Katie Holmes Edition (Again)

Sigh. Oh, Katie Holmes. Snarkista is naming you her winner for “Most Crimes Against Fashion 2008.” No, it won’t help you get a Tony Award. Are you not living in New York, arguably the fashion capital of the world? And is it not WINTER in New York? Even if [...]

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December 18, 2008

Tom Cruise Gives Katie Holmes Hallucinogens For Her Birthday

Tom Cruise has been on a tour lately to try and convince us he’s normal. Guess what? Nice try, but EPIC FAIL. Tommy-Girl has been alluding for weeks that his birthday present for wife Katie Holmes was going to be really special. Oh, it’s special alright. Katie better haul ass.
Tom revealed his [...]

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December 13, 2008

The Year’s Best Viral Videos!

Here’s an awesome collection of the year’s best viral videos, from our friends at Videogum! Included are some awesome Sasha Fierce wannabes, a Saxby Chambliss slip-up, The Jesus Is My Friend song, Tom Cruise’s Sci-bot recruiting vid, Barack Roll, Christian the Lion, a young Bill O’Reilly LOSING IT (warning…no bleeps), and so much more! [...]

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December 2, 2008

Tom Cruise Wants To Marry David Beckham. Oh, And Posh Too.

This is NOT gonna help squelch those “Tom Cruise is gay” rumors! Tommy-girl is a certifiable freak. Australia’s Live News says that he gave David and Victoria Beckham a truly bizarre Thanksgiving present…a pseudo-wedding between him, David, Katie and Posh. WTF?! Who the hell gives Thanksgiving presents anyways? Sneaky Scientologists, that’s [...]

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November 23, 2008

Yuck Alert: David Spade And Nicolette Sheridan’s PDA

How in the hell does lil’ David Spade do it? He’s a babe magnet! The Spadester came to Nicolette Sheridan’s 45th birthday party and put the mojo on her, reportedly resulting in some major PDA in front of the guests. OK Magazine elaborates:
The Desperate Housewives star was celebrating her 45th birthday at [...]

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