Chris Rock On Bill Clinton & The View, Alaska And Moose

Ahhh, the economy is BEYOND being in the crapper. It is CRISIS TIME!!! The boyz on the Hill are talking “Great Depression”, “Pearl Harbor”, “Global Meltdown.” And there ain’t shit we little people can do about it. Unless you’re a damn good survivalist! We can’t find freakin’ gas in Nashville! So… here’s a bit of levity from Chris Rock on David Letterman the other night. It won’t bring back the value of the dollar, or your 401k, or make ’em take the damn bags off of the gas pump handles. Snarkista’s not gonna lie to you about that. UNLIKE OUR POLITICIANS!!! But Chris is still funny. Thank God some things are still the same.

Stumped By The Candidates? FREE LEVI!



Obama, McCain, Biden, Palin…so many choices it makes the brain hurt! Add to the mix the major fuckery going on in ALL of our largest financial institutions- Hurricanes Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, and OWWWW!!!





Give yourself a break and hop onto a cause with some meat in it. And I mean a HUNK of meat. Specifically, the hunk of meat named Levi Johnston, former happy-go-lucky Alaskan redneck, literally plucked out of obscurity into the limelight of Election 2008. All for knocking up Bristol Palin. Cheezus.

American ingenuity always comes through in a crisis, and many feel the need to FREE LEVI from a shotgun wedding is a cause they can genuinely get behind. Therefore, cottage industry! Cafepress has all you need to help free Levi, tell Levi to RUN, or just have something to put in your yard ‘cuz you can’t decide on a candidate! Better than Excedrin! Now if we could just FREE THE DEFICIT! It’s about to get a HELL of a lot bigger. Happy Retirement!!

Keith Olbermann And Chris Matthews Canned By MSNBC

MSNBC, after much pressure, has decided to can Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews from their co-anchor positions, and has made them commentators instead. This follows growing criticism that the two are too incendiary to serve us unbiased anchors. David Gregory will be the sole anchor of MSNBC’s election coverage. Anyone who has watched Olbermann and Matthew’s coverage this year would have to agree it has been anything BUT fair and balanced. For grins, watch the Obama Love video below to see how much Chris Matthews has a hard-on for Barack.

Olbermann has been criticized for being overly enthusiastic in praising the Democrats and vilifying Republicans, while on-air bickering between Olbermann and Matthews has embarrassed NBC News members and, many believe, alienated viewers.

There are plenty of legitimate stories to cover in the election! If one wants to be a commentator, or give an op-ed, one should NOT be an anchor. This shizz has been brewing at MSNBC for a long time, and it’s been pissing off Tom Brokaw who said that “at times Matthews and Olbermann went too far”. Don’t eff with Brokaw, fools! He will shut you DOWN!

Oprah: No Room On The Couch For Sarah Palin


Oprah Winfrey is denying a piece by The Drudge Report saying she won’t have Republican VP nominee Sarah Palin as a guest on her show. An Oprah insider tells Drudge that:

“Half of her staff really wants Sarah Palin on. Oprah’s website is getting tons of requests to put her on, but Oprah and a couple of her top people are adamantly against it because of Obama.

Oprah tells TMZ.com that:

At the beginning of this presidential campaign when I decided that I was going to take my first public stance in support of a candidate, I made the decision not to use my show as a platform for any of the candidates. I agree that Sarah Palin would be a fantastic interview, and I would love to have her on after the campaign is over,” she adds. “There has been absolutely no discussion about having Sarah Palin on my show.

Oprah’s early backing of Obama helped expose America to him early in his campaign. He’s a historic candidate. So is she. Snarkista wonders why Oprah doesn’t find a woman who’s nominated for Vice President of the USA a worthy interview right now? Obviously she isn’t going to ENDORSE Palin. Whatever happened to empowering women? It’s NOT like Oprah agrees with the viewpoints of all of her guests! Somehow it just smacks of sexism to Snarkista, and sexism from a woman just sucks harder.

The “business-guru” side of Oprah should take a second look at this decision. Her ratings have slipped significantly since her Obama endorsement…probably because some of her audience didn’t like her taking sides, and may not have agreed with her. Having Palin on would be a sure ratings bonanza. Guess Oprah just isn’t that focused on being a maverick any more. Pity.

Tougher In Alaska: Sarah Palin’s Convention Speech Video

Well, last night was one for the history books. Rudy Guiliani teed it up, and Sarah Palin knocked it out of the park. Snarkista gives Sarah major props for grace under fire, an excellent speech, and for kicking some media ass. Her whole family was there to watch, including her parents AND hot future son-in-law Levi Johnston! You would NEVER know that Sarah’s teleprompter was way effed up, was broken at first, skipped around, and then went too fast. Did not phase the barracuda. Here’s the video of Sarah Palin’s speech last night at the Republican National Convention.

Snarkista knows that work/kids/life may not allow you the luxury of time to watch the entire speech, so here is the text transcript of Sarah Palin’s convention speech at the Republican National Convention.

In case you missed it, here is Joe Biden’s convention speech video.

Pictures of the Palin Family and Levi Johnston with John McCain from last night.

McCain Campaign Threatens To Sue The National Enquirer


UPDATE-UPDATE: Definitely sic Sarah on them, John. It is all bullshizz. UPDATE: Screw suing the National Enquirer, John. Just unleash Sarah Barracuda on their asses! She’ll tear ’em a new one with a smile on her face. What’s the difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom? Lipstick.

The National Enquirer hit the web just hours before Republican VP nominee Sarah Palin‘s hotly anticipated speech tonight with some salacious statements. Supposedly, the print issue of the rag has more dirt on Palin. The Enquirer’s teaser says:

“The National Enquirer’s coverage of a vicious war within Sarah Palin’s extended family includes several newsworthy revelations, including the resulting incredible charge of an affair plus details of family strife when the Governor’s daughter revealed her pregnancy. Following our John Edwards’ exclusives, our political reporting has obviously proven to be more detail-oriented than the McCain campaign’s vetting process. Despite the McCain camp’s attempts to control press coverage they find unfavorable, The Enquirer will continue to pursue news on both sides of the political spectrum.”

The tabloid seems to be going full force into political expose, after being emboldened by the final fall of John Edwards. McCain is livid, and after four other magazines hit the stands today with Palin on the cover, he’s had enough. McCain has now threatened to sue the National Enquirer.
The campaign had this to say:

“The smearing of the Palin family must end. The allegations contained on the cover of the National Enquirer insinuating that Gov. Palin had an extramarital affair are categorically false. It is a vicious lie,” said McCain senior adviser Steve Schmidt. “The efforts of the media and tabloids to destroy this fine and accomplished public servant are a disgrace. The American people will reject it.”

The whole thing is a freakin’ feeding frenzy, and unless the Enquirer has some ironclad evidence, they’re gonna burn through any credibility they earned by outing John Edwards in his extramarital affair. The Palin family has been through a trial by fire this week, and Snarkista thinks that Ms. Tougher In Alaska is NOT gonna forget who was throwing chum at the sharks. Maybe give it a rest for a few days? Before some fool prints that Palin’s a guy? Geez.