Posh Victoria Beckham to Guest Judge on American Idol

Paula Abdul‘s seat is still warm after quitting the show earlier this week, but American Idol execs are already scouting for guest judges to fill in for the newly departed icon. First up, former Spice Girl “Posh” Victoria Beckham.

Source: Wikimedia Commons
Source: Wikimedia Commons

The wife of superstar soccer god David Beckham will reportedly earn over $200,000 for a one-time guest judge appearance on American Idol’s 9th season.

Meanwhile, Paula Abdul said on Wednesday that she is already missing her co-judges on Idol and told TMZ.com jokingly that she’s sure Simon Cowell “misses me already” too.

As for that offer from former American Idol executive producer Nigel Lythgoe to guest judge on So You Think You Can Dance, Paula isn’t sure what she’ll be doing next. “It’s been overwhelming what’s going on right now, so I have to really carefully think about everything.”

Idol Flashback: Early Simon Cowell

simon-cowell-early-v-necks

It’s Tuesday night, and American Idol has reached the stage in the show where the real competition starts. Time to do the office pool! Simon, Randy, Paula and new girl Kara D will be culling the herd…no doubt with Simon in his V-necks- moobs highlighted.

Good to see Simon really has had a lifelong relationship with the V’s. This picture is so old that Simey is rocking out a Mork meets the Bee-Gees theme, saucily. It’s undeniable, the V’s are a classic for Europeans…not that it’s an excuse for hairy men to wear them. See ya tonight, Samson Simon.

Simon Fuller And Simon Cowell Are Nasty Bastards

UPDATE 10/31/08: You can do Josiah Leming a solid by downloading his EP “Angels Undercover” from Amazon or itunes. Check out Josiah’s Myspace too.

Hey, greedy Simons, take some advice. You better BACK OFF of Josiah Leming, and stop trying to tie him up with a dastardly 19E slave deal.

Snarkista’s dealt with 19E, the management arm that puts American Idols into bonded servitude in trade for managing their careers and putting out their records. She can’t say much except that she negotiated HARD with 19E attorneys over an event, and got her way. It was not easy, as they assume things are their way or the highway. Except when you have something they want, which Snarkista did. So she hammered out HER way, and they had to fall in line. All this is to say, they are hard-ass bastards. And Josiah’s is an example of the unthinkable things they pull.

You may remember Josiah Leming, he was the homeless singer that won hearts all over the world with his hard-knock life…living out of his car. Josiah had great spirit, though, despite his great hardships. Now, his mother is dying of cancer, and he might be blocked from releasing the album he recorded because he was a contestant last season on “American Idol.”

Josiah, 19, wasn’t a contestant for long, he didn’t even make the show’s top 24. Still, he received an official letter from “Idol” threatening legal action if he puts out his record in January as planned.

“Idol” contestants must sign strict contracts with the show’s producer, Simon Fuller and Simon Cowell’s 19 Entertainment, promising to record only with the label chosen by “Idol” – Sony/BMG. The 19 Entertainment shop also retains exclusive right of refusal for management and merchandising. These contracts are the most restrictive by far in the music industry…NOBODY else would ever sign with 19E unless they were forced to like Idols are.

When American Idol began in 2002, only finalists had to sign the contract, but now it’s mandatory for ALL contestants. No word on where they draw the line on “contestant”, it’s possible that hundreds of Idol rejects are now contracted to 19E who will never produce or record them.

A representative for Josiah says: “Josiah was the only ‘Idol’ contestant ever to get a record deal who didn’t make the top 24, and one of only four contestants to get a deal this year. He has personal reasons for getting his music out, threat or not.”

The New York Post says “Leming is now racing the clock. His mother has terminal cancer, and nothing is going to stop him from getting his music out while she is alive to share it. His album on Warner Records will be released in late January ’09.” Josiah’s lawyer shot a letter back to “Idol” producers but hasn’t heard back. “We’re waiting,” the rep said.

This is a sucky lesson for you who are talented and try out for Idol. You better read that contract thoroughly, and then decide if you wanna get in bed with 19E. They play hardball, they will OWN you, and their only motivation is the almighty dollar. They’re paranoid as well, and you will see just how much when you read the confidentiality clauses. Trust Snarkista. Those clauses are hilarious except they’re so deadly serious about them. Every breach can cost you $50,000 or more. And you can breach by sneezing. Or staring.

Josiah, you fight those assclowns. They are TERRIFIED of bad publicity (again, read the confidentiality clauses). Give as many interviews with sympathetic media (won’t be hard to find) as you can. You and your 8 siblings take care of your mama, and tell your lawyer get ready to act like Tony Soprano. Because you have to speak the language they understand.

Simon Cowell Makes Paula Wanna Drink (More).


Ooooh, reports of shizz hitting the fan are circulating about American Idol’s Mr. Nasty, Simon Cowell. Personally, Snarkista hearts Simon, because he’s so dang crotchety, suffers no fools, and he isn’t tone deaf. Paula’s fun to watch because she’s a walking acid trip with occasional amnesia, narcolepsy and verbal diarrhea. Randy is a one-joke joke that we’ve heard WAY to many times, dawg. The new girl with the giant resume is the BIG unknown for the upcoming season, although Paula has surely been asking Mr. Jack Daniels for pointers on how to off the biyotch. Auditions have already begun, and the new season of Idol starts in January.

Simon is apparently making too much money. Isn’t it always about the money? In this case, Simon’s making about $42 million a year more than Paula, and about $48 million more than Randy. Paula needs to clam up, because she is NOT gonna make $8 million a year recycling “Scat Cat” crap from the ’80’s. Simon’s a co-creator of the show, he renegotiates his salary every year, his record label signs the winners. Randy has side projects, and is well-respected in the music world…even if he sounds like a freakin’ broken record on the show. Paula has…a seat at the table and an opaque Coke glass. $8 million a year is plenty to keep the glass full of Jesus Juice. Don’t rock the boat, Paula, or that new girl (Kara DioGuardi) may take you out. Seriously, have you seen the chick’s resume? It is KILLER. AND she’s hot. Better play nice.

Paula Abdul Has A New Reason To Drink

On his radio show today, Ryan Seacrest announced that American Idol will have a fourth judge this year! The newbie is Kara DioGuardi, a singer, songwriter, producer and artist. She may be new to the Idol stage, but she’s a formidable force in the music industry. Fox says:

DioGuardi’s songs have appeared on more than 100 million records. Her songs have been recorded by Grammy award-winning artists including Kelly Clarkson, Christina Aguilera, Gwen Stefani, Celine Dion, Faith Hill, Carrie Underwood, Santana and Pink. Scores of major recording artists including Britney Spears, Avril Lavigne, Pussycat Dolls, Miley Cyrus, The Jonas Brothers, Natasha Bedingfield, Jewel, Ashley Tisdale, Katharine McPhee, Taylor Hicks, Bo Bice, Clay Aiken, Ashlee Simpson, Hilary Duff, Jessica Simpson, Kylie Minogue, Enrique Iglesias, Nick Lachey and Marc Anthony have also released DioGuardi’s songs.

Over the last four years, she has been awarded 10 BMI Pop Awards for having written the most performed songs on radio. From her catalog of several hundred songs, over 264 have been released on major labels worldwide; and over 165 have appeared on multi-platinum selling albums. DioGuardi co-owns Arthous Entertainment, where she develops and mentors fellow hit writers, producers and artists.

Wow. That is one HELL of a resume. Kara’s quite attractive as well! Paula is gonna look even MORE like a lightweight next to Kara. Randy will too. Here’s hoping for some great catfights between Paula and Kara, and for Simon to immediately begin seduction attempts. Must-see tv!

Read Hollywood Hills‘ take on the situation here!

Girls Aloud To Star In Show Based On Simon Cowell

British girl band Girls Aloud is coming to the small screen. Snarkista’s favorite Fab Five are going to star in a drama series titled “The Secret World Of Sam King.”

The series, created by record label Universal Records, will be shown exclusively to users of UK teen social networking site Bebo, and will base its main character on American Idol judge Simon Cowell! The series will be focused on the early days of his career in the music business, showing his brilliance at spotting new talents just like Simon did during his youth.

Girls Aloud are ALL about the camp, which is one reason Snarkista adores them. Cheryl Cole, Sarah Harding, Nadine Coyle, Kimberley Walsh, and Nicola Roberts are said to be excited to take part on the project. A friend tells Brit Newspaper the Daily Star that:

They’re all really excited – it promises to be a lot of fun. They’ve made a lot of cool videos, and it’s no secret that several of the girls harbor ambitions to get into acting and this will prove a great showcase.

Too bad those of us on this side of the pond will initially have to watch on the net. The news does, however, give Snarkista the PERFECT excuse to repost her FAVE Girls Aloud video- for the song I Can’t Speak French. Take some notes, Trannycats!

Did Simon’s Comments on Idol Hurt David Cook? Vote!

I had PIMP JUICE all over me last night, courtesy of Simon Cowell. American Idol’s David Cook vs. David Archuleta final showdown featured great performances from both Davids. The boxing format, however, was incredibly lame, NIGEL.

Simon was clearly there to laud all over Archie and crap all over Cook. Do you think his harshness hurt David Cook’s chances with the voters? Lots of people made up their minds before last night. Or, are you a conspiracy theorist who thinks Simon was using double top-secret reverse psychology on America so the fans would SAVE David Cook? Vote and let us know!